Motives

Two people can do the same thing; and one can be right and the other can be wrong. Now that seems counterintuitive, but I learned that principle from Jesus of Nazareth. One could say that it is good to give to the needy. Jesus says that if we give to the needy with the goal of everyone knowing what we did, then we are in sin. Jesus expects people to pray. But one could pray with humble sincerity or with self justifying pride. Even without the teachings of Scripture we can see this illustrated in everyday life. Once when I was in New York City, someone jerked me back by my shirt; however, they saved me from being hit by a taxi in doing that. So someone can do the same action but the motive often determines if the action was good or bad.

Moreover, two people can do the opposite action with the same motive. Because I care for my child, I could give him a gift. And because I care for my child I could take the same thing away as discipline. I could use strong language to make a point to someone or I could use gentle language to make the same point to someone else. I think you get the idea.

It is not always as easy as we would like to tell someone’s motives from their actions or words. Yet, we live in a culture that always assumes the worst of the other. This destroys the hope of constructive conversation. If someone says or does something that I disagree with, it may mean that their motives are bad or maybe not. This is not to say that the consequences may not cause harm. I have tried to help people in a way that ultimately did not and I have had to apologize. But knowing my intentions does help the one I offended understand my heart.

Bear with me for a moment while I illustrate this further: Some of my friends propose political policies that learn towards some form of socialism because they care for the poor. Some of my friends propose more conservative economic policies because they believe the poor can have the best opportunity for advancement in that environment. (My goal is not to defend or support one or the other within this example.) So the progressive thinks that the economically conservative hates the poor and wants to expand the wealth gap. The conservative thinks the progressive desires communist power and is dumb because he does not understand the massive food shortages under historic communism. Both have fused a particular line of thought or action with a negative motive. Yet both could desire their line of thought because of the same motive.

Now I am not saying that what we think and do does not matter. I believe that those particular thoughts and actions have real consequences either good or bad. But we unintentionally rob ourselves of accomplishing our goals if we assume the worst motive for our opponent. So if I assume the worst of my opponent, I do not really engage the idea. Now engaging someone else’s idea need not change my opinion; but it will point out potential flaws and misunderstandings that I may have. In other words, engaging the idea will help me accomplish the intention or motive that I desire more effectively than if I had not engaged the idea in the first place.

Furthermore, we have to live in the same world as our ideological opponents. So, it would be helpful if we sought to understand what they thought and their motives in the most charitable light. Again, this may not mean that either of us change our mind. But at the very least we can understand that our motives might not be all that different from one another.